1
00:01:24,810 --> 00:01:26,130
Oh, there, there, there.

2
00:01:26,850 --> 00:01:31,050
Did you have to spend the night all
alone in your little basket? Never mind,

3
00:01:31,050 --> 00:01:33,150
dear. Tonight you should sleep in our
bed.

4
00:01:33,370 --> 00:01:37,190
And if Uncle George doesn't like it,
Uncle George can sleep in the basket.

5
00:01:39,010 --> 00:01:40,610
Oh, go on.

6
00:01:41,010 --> 00:01:42,010
Kill.

7
00:01:44,410 --> 00:01:46,090
Not now, Mildred.

8
00:01:47,810 --> 00:01:48,810
Stop it.

9
00:01:50,550 --> 00:01:52,250
I'll go and kill.

10
00:01:52,770 --> 00:01:54,720
Oh, she loves... She likes you, George.

11
00:01:55,440 --> 00:01:57,060
God knows why, but she does.

12
00:01:58,060 --> 00:01:59,700
Well, it's unhygienic, Mildred.

13
00:01:59,960 --> 00:02:01,600
I could get Arpad or something.

14
00:02:01,800 --> 00:02:02,800
Oh, don't be ridiculous.

15
00:02:03,060 --> 00:02:05,120
Come on, Truffles, you leave them alone.

16
00:02:05,480 --> 00:02:06,740
Oh, come on, Truffles.

17
00:02:06,960 --> 00:02:09,560
If a sissy named that, you should have
called her Fang or Satan.

18
00:02:10,300 --> 00:02:13,660
I was thinking of calling her Rags,
after my wardrobe.

19
00:02:14,680 --> 00:02:17,200
I don't like her coming in our bedroom,
Mildred. Why not?

20
00:02:17,700 --> 00:02:22,300
Well, I mean, I might have been in the
mood to, you know, you and me.

21
00:02:22,860 --> 00:02:24,400
Well, I couldn't good after the dog on
the bench.

22
00:02:24,620 --> 00:02:26,360
I'll take you straight down. Hang on.

23
00:02:27,680 --> 00:02:30,660
I didn't say I was in the mood. I said
if I was and I'm not. Oh,

24
00:02:31,360 --> 00:02:32,360
please him.

25
00:02:32,460 --> 00:02:34,200
Hey, where's my tea and toast?

26
00:02:34,500 --> 00:02:38,320
The toast is in the bread bin, George.
The tea's in the caddy. Oh, I see.

27
00:02:38,840 --> 00:02:40,620
Come on then, Truffles.

28
00:02:41,520 --> 00:02:42,520
Beg.

29
00:02:42,780 --> 00:02:43,780
Can't I have some of yours?

30
00:02:44,060 --> 00:02:45,520
Well, of course you can if you like,
George.

31
00:02:56,560 --> 00:02:58,120
after breakfast, we might go to the
park.

32
00:02:58,640 --> 00:03:02,400
Oh, what a good idea, Anne. Well, thank
you, Geoffrey. And what do you think,

33
00:03:02,480 --> 00:03:04,320
Tristan? Oh, yes, Mummy.

34
00:03:04,580 --> 00:03:06,400
Good. Well, that's what we'll do then.

35
00:03:07,020 --> 00:03:09,720
You're a wonderful mum, Anne. Well,
thank you, Geoffrey.

36
00:03:09,940 --> 00:03:11,240
Why are you talking to yourself?

37
00:03:11,680 --> 00:03:13,240
Just to make sure I haven't gone deaf.

38
00:03:13,540 --> 00:03:18,300
I know you're both there. I can see your
knuckles.

39
00:03:19,120 --> 00:03:22,300
Very well. If you want to chat, we'll
chat. Tristan, put your comic down. Your

40
00:03:22,300 --> 00:03:23,300
mother wants to chat.

41
00:03:23,340 --> 00:03:24,340
Off you go, Anne.

42
00:03:30,440 --> 00:03:31,440
interesting in the paper?

43
00:03:31,540 --> 00:03:32,319
I don't know.

44
00:03:32,320 --> 00:03:33,980
I'm not reading it. I'm chatting.

45
00:03:34,580 --> 00:03:35,940
Can I have a dog? No.

46
00:03:36,520 --> 00:03:37,700
Mrs Roper's got a dog.

47
00:03:37,900 --> 00:03:40,860
Mrs Roper's also got a bald -headed
loony with a ginger moustache. Do you

48
00:03:40,860 --> 00:03:41,860
one of them? Yes.

49
00:03:43,120 --> 00:03:45,100
We had this all day yesterday.

50
00:03:45,320 --> 00:03:46,860
Can I have a dog? Can I have a dog?

51
00:03:47,260 --> 00:03:49,200
So I could when I was older. So?

52
00:03:49,560 --> 00:03:50,560
I'm old enough.

53
00:03:50,780 --> 00:03:54,080
You've already got a goldfish. You can't
throw sticks for a goldfish.

54
00:03:54,300 --> 00:03:55,800
Well, you can, but it won't bring them
back.

55
00:03:56,280 --> 00:03:58,140
Is it my fault if he hasn't trained it
properly?

56
00:04:03,400 --> 00:04:05,400
Why couldn't you bring me some breakfast
in bed?

57
00:04:06,020 --> 00:04:07,540
I wasn't in the mood, George.

58
00:04:07,860 --> 00:04:10,780
You know how it is. I mean, sometimes
one just isn't in the mood.

59
00:04:11,180 --> 00:04:12,180
Isn't that right?

60
00:04:13,020 --> 00:04:16,779
I've got a thing for me supper, have I?
It's breakfast, George.

61
00:04:17,079 --> 00:04:18,720
And thinging isn't involved.

62
00:04:19,560 --> 00:04:22,400
I'd get better treatment if I had a cold
nose and dropped hairs all over the

63
00:04:22,400 --> 00:04:23,700
place. You have and you do.

64
00:04:26,680 --> 00:04:28,460
It's not for the household that thing
has.

65
00:04:28,900 --> 00:04:32,320
I only have a chance to read the
newspaper which whisked away from me and

66
00:04:32,320 --> 00:04:33,259
on the floor.

67
00:04:33,260 --> 00:04:35,060
I have to do the crossword on my hands
and knees.

68
00:04:35,280 --> 00:04:37,380
Well, George, she's got to be house
-trained.

69
00:04:37,640 --> 00:04:39,400
She is house -trained. She does it all
over the house.

70
00:04:40,800 --> 00:04:41,800
Now, look.

71
00:04:41,900 --> 00:04:43,360
You've reminded her. What?

72
00:04:43,600 --> 00:04:45,900
Look, she's got that sort of look in her
eye.

73
00:04:46,320 --> 00:04:47,940
You take her out to the garden, George.

74
00:04:48,640 --> 00:04:55,540
Quickly. All Tristan wants is a dog. You
might like it. It might bite

75
00:04:55,540 --> 00:04:56,479
Mr Roper.

76
00:04:56,480 --> 00:04:57,480
Ah.

77
00:04:57,660 --> 00:04:59,380
No, no, you can't tempt me, Anne.

78
00:05:00,400 --> 00:05:02,340
Do you know how much a pedigree dog
would cost?

79
00:05:02,890 --> 00:05:05,830
It doesn't have to have a pedigree, as
long as it whoops at one end and wags at

80
00:05:05,830 --> 00:05:06,569
the other.

81
00:05:06,570 --> 00:05:09,890
No, no, I'm sorry. You could teach it to
snarl at Michael Foot when he comes on

82
00:05:09,890 --> 00:05:10,529
the television.

83
00:05:10,530 --> 00:05:11,870
No, no, no, I've no intention.

84
00:05:12,810 --> 00:05:14,130
Good God, look at that.

85
00:05:14,570 --> 00:05:16,090
And in my back garden.

86
00:05:17,050 --> 00:05:18,130
Enough is enough.

87
00:05:21,490 --> 00:05:22,730
Oh, Dean.

88
00:05:25,810 --> 00:05:26,810
Look,

89
00:05:26,930 --> 00:05:30,110
she got to the paper before I did,
Mildred. Look at this.

90
00:05:30,370 --> 00:05:31,500
Oh. Stop moaning.

91
00:05:31,800 --> 00:05:34,280
Yeah, and she's been having a go at my
armchair. Look at them teeth marks.

92
00:05:34,840 --> 00:05:36,540
Some of those are yours, George.

93
00:05:37,920 --> 00:05:40,040
That was from when England was beaten by
Scotland.

94
00:05:40,680 --> 00:05:43,300
Did you manage to get out into the
garden in time? Yeah, just about.

95
00:05:43,600 --> 00:05:44,319
Oh, good.

96
00:05:44,320 --> 00:05:47,040
Yeah, when's she going to learn? We're
leaving up every five minutes to shove

97
00:05:47,040 --> 00:05:50,120
her on the grass, and half the time it's
a false alarm. Oh, but George, she's so

98
00:05:50,120 --> 00:05:53,860
little, you see. I mean, it's difficult
to tell whether she's just sitting down

99
00:05:53,860 --> 00:05:55,160
or... The other.

100
00:05:56,020 --> 00:05:57,380
Did you have any breakfast?

101
00:05:57,620 --> 00:06:00,060
Well, yeah. I had a cup of tea and some
of them little hard biscuits.

102
00:06:00,480 --> 00:06:01,480
Little hard biscuits.

103
00:06:07,160 --> 00:06:10,940
Oh, look at this. It's useless, Mildred.
Look. Look at this. Half a photo.

104
00:06:11,660 --> 00:06:15,020
Percy Thrower showing Margaret Thatcher
his prize something or other.

105
00:06:16,080 --> 00:06:17,300
We'll never know what it was.

106
00:06:17,540 --> 00:06:18,660
Well, it'll be on the news tonight.

107
00:06:19,020 --> 00:06:20,900
Judging by the expression on her face,
it might not.

108
00:06:23,060 --> 00:06:26,320
If that's a dog, tell her to come in the
back way. Oh, shut up.

109
00:06:32,140 --> 00:06:33,320
Oh, good morning, Mr Fonk.

110
00:06:35,000 --> 00:06:38,740
I thought she was in the back garden.
She was. My back garden.

111
00:06:39,120 --> 00:06:40,520
Yours? Burrowed under the fence.

112
00:06:40,780 --> 00:06:42,660
He asked me if there's a touch of mole
about that dog.

113
00:06:43,180 --> 00:06:47,000
He dug up half my marigolds. Oh, I'm so
sorry. Look, why don't you come in and

114
00:06:47,000 --> 00:06:47,859
talk to George?

115
00:06:47,860 --> 00:06:49,440
I mean, after all, he is the head of the
household.

116
00:06:50,440 --> 00:06:51,440
Sometimes.

117
00:06:56,440 --> 00:06:59,560
George, Mr. Paul Mile has a little
complaint.

118
00:06:59,860 --> 00:07:01,180
She's bitten the head off my dahlias.

119
00:07:01,540 --> 00:07:02,540
Why'd you do that?

120
00:07:06,300 --> 00:07:07,300
Not me.

121
00:07:07,400 --> 00:07:08,760
Your dog, Trifles.

122
00:07:09,660 --> 00:07:11,920
Truffles. He's dug a hole in my lawn as
well.

123
00:07:12,180 --> 00:07:13,440
Oh, what a shame.

124
00:07:14,960 --> 00:07:18,160
She's fond of burying things. I only
just rescued me teeth in time yesterday.

125
00:07:19,920 --> 00:07:20,459
Oh, sorry.

126
00:07:20,460 --> 00:07:22,840
But I'm sure George will play for any
damages.

127
00:07:23,120 --> 00:07:24,019
Oh, yeah.

128
00:07:24,020 --> 00:07:25,420
I mean,

129
00:07:26,680 --> 00:07:31,100
can mere money compensate for the beauty
of a garden in bloom?

130
00:07:31,440 --> 00:07:35,440
I mean, can cash be put against the
loveliness of Mother Nature in all her

131
00:07:35,440 --> 00:07:37,780
glory? Yes, it can. About £15, I'll send
you the bill.

132
00:07:38,700 --> 00:07:40,680
Typical, that is. The bloody fillish,
Annie.

133
00:07:41,860 --> 00:07:44,720
Now you've upset Mr Formile. Me?

134
00:07:44,940 --> 00:07:47,540
It's that mobile dish mop of yours. Oh,
don't.

135
00:07:48,750 --> 00:07:51,970
I mean, look at her, that wistful gleam
in her eye.

136
00:07:52,210 --> 00:07:54,730
Just a twinkle of scampishness.

137
00:07:55,010 --> 00:07:57,490
Yeah, well, I've a good mind to take her
out and lose her, twinkle and all.

138
00:07:57,710 --> 00:07:59,870
It wouldn't be worth the hospital bills,
George.

139
00:08:00,110 --> 00:08:03,670
Eh? Since you've volunteered, you can
take her out.

140
00:08:04,070 --> 00:08:09,030
I'll clean her up, and then we'll go for
walking twice around the park. Now,

141
00:08:09,030 --> 00:08:10,890
look here, Mildred, I'm not in the...
Hey, you!

142
00:08:20,510 --> 00:08:21,510
Here they are, Tuckle.

143
00:08:21,830 --> 00:08:23,310
You'll like it in here. It's better than
the pot.

144
00:08:24,170 --> 00:08:25,170
Hello.

145
00:08:26,730 --> 00:08:27,730
Morning.

146
00:08:30,390 --> 00:08:33,530
Can I have a pint of brown ale when
you're ready and a packet of cheese and

147
00:08:33,530 --> 00:08:34,530
onion crisps?

148
00:08:39,630 --> 00:08:40,630
Oi!

149
00:08:43,470 --> 00:08:44,950
Your dog just drank some of my beer.

150
00:08:45,750 --> 00:08:46,750
Oh, sorry.

151
00:08:46,770 --> 00:08:47,770
Top that up, will you?

152
00:08:55,470 --> 00:08:56,470
Put her on the floor.

153
00:08:58,370 --> 00:08:59,670
That's a nice puppy, isn't it?

154
00:09:01,510 --> 00:09:02,510
I hate dogs.

155
00:09:03,610 --> 00:09:06,570
My wife left me because of dogs.

156
00:09:07,110 --> 00:09:08,110
Oh, yeah?

157
00:09:08,190 --> 00:09:09,810
Used to lose all her housekeeping money
on them.

158
00:09:11,350 --> 00:09:13,290
That's one reason why I don't like dogs.

159
00:09:13,830 --> 00:09:17,490
And another reason why I don't like dogs
is because what your dog's just done on

160
00:09:17,490 --> 00:09:18,490
my boot.

161
00:09:35,900 --> 00:09:39,220
Where's Trish? In the kitchen. Why? I've
got him something. Something he really

162
00:09:39,220 --> 00:09:40,220
wants.

163
00:09:40,280 --> 00:09:41,720
Oh, Geoffrey.

164
00:09:42,120 --> 00:09:43,760
You've actually got him a... Well, yes.

165
00:09:43,960 --> 00:09:46,700
Sort of. I mean, it wags at one end and
whoops at the other. Oh.

166
00:09:47,360 --> 00:09:48,480
Runs on batteries. Look.

167
00:09:54,540 --> 00:09:55,900
Trish, close your eyes.

168
00:09:56,980 --> 00:09:57,980
You've got to surprise me.

169
00:10:00,120 --> 00:10:01,120
I keep them closed.

170
00:10:08,080 --> 00:10:09,080
Right, you can open them now.

171
00:10:10,740 --> 00:10:11,740
Oh.

172
00:10:12,540 --> 00:10:13,540
Watch this.

173
00:10:17,140 --> 00:10:18,600
Look at that.

174
00:10:23,940 --> 00:10:25,640
Daddy bought it especially for you.

175
00:10:26,420 --> 00:10:27,420
Watch this.

176
00:10:32,440 --> 00:10:33,660
It's not real.

177
00:10:34,100 --> 00:10:36,280
No, but it doesn't make a mess or...

178
00:10:36,480 --> 00:10:39,920
Malt or dig -up gardens. It's better
than a real dog, isn't it?

179
00:10:40,700 --> 00:10:42,520
Well, it's different.

180
00:10:43,980 --> 00:10:45,700
Well, you like it, don't you?

181
00:10:46,360 --> 00:10:50,540
Oh, yes, it's sort of almost what I
wanted.

182
00:10:50,880 --> 00:10:53,140
Well, nearly almost.

183
00:10:53,860 --> 00:10:54,860
Sort of.

184
00:10:59,500 --> 00:11:00,720
Well, it's nice in here, isn't it?

185
00:11:01,460 --> 00:11:02,460
Friendly.

186
00:11:04,640 --> 00:11:05,629
I am.

187
00:11:05,630 --> 00:11:07,150
Who do you think will win the 330, then?

188
00:11:08,250 --> 00:11:09,250
Knock it off.

189
00:11:09,310 --> 00:11:10,850
Knock it off? Oh, yeah, who's riding it?

190
00:11:13,690 --> 00:11:15,030
This is a greyhound standard.

191
00:11:16,010 --> 00:11:17,070
Greyhounds don't have riders.

192
00:11:17,370 --> 00:11:18,370
Oh.

193
00:11:19,110 --> 00:11:20,450
You live and learn, don't you?

194
00:11:21,670 --> 00:11:23,030
They're nice dogs, aren't they,
greyhounds?

195
00:11:23,430 --> 00:11:26,110
At least you don't drink your beer and
piddle on your boots.

196
00:11:44,140 --> 00:11:46,220
I mean, she wouldn't have picked on you
if there'd been a tree handy.

197
00:11:47,480 --> 00:11:48,720
But there wasn't, not in here.

198
00:11:50,040 --> 00:11:53,920
They do say that pet owners get to look
like the pets they own.

199
00:11:54,480 --> 00:11:55,480
Yeah, I've heard that.

200
00:11:55,500 --> 00:11:57,560
Yeah. Do you by any chance own a ferret?

201
00:11:58,300 --> 00:11:59,300
No.

202
00:11:59,880 --> 00:12:01,040
Amazing. Yeah.

203
00:12:03,880 --> 00:12:04,880
Yeah.

204
00:12:04,960 --> 00:12:06,460
Did you insult me just then?

205
00:12:07,120 --> 00:12:08,039
Yeah, I did.

206
00:12:08,040 --> 00:12:09,040
Yeah?

207
00:12:09,480 --> 00:12:10,700
Yeah, well, you probably didn't mean to.

208
00:12:12,060 --> 00:12:13,060
Yeah, well, I'll be off then.

209
00:12:17,070 --> 00:12:19,050
He wants to watch it, that young fella,
that's all.

210
00:12:22,670 --> 00:12:27,810
Oh, my God, she'll murder me.

211
00:12:57,930 --> 00:13:01,250
It's quite a nice toy dog, Mildred, but
it's not the same. I mean, if Geoffrey

212
00:13:01,250 --> 00:13:04,410
came home and found a toy wife in bed,
he'd soon object.

213
00:13:04,810 --> 00:13:06,310
Hmm. George wouldn't.

214
00:13:08,050 --> 00:13:10,050
He's not very sensitive in certain
areas.

215
00:13:10,270 --> 00:13:11,370
Yeah, same as George.

216
00:13:12,010 --> 00:13:14,910
He means well, but he's forgotten what
it's like to be little.

217
00:13:15,150 --> 00:13:22,110
Would George... Would you like another
cup of tea, dear? Yes, please, yes.

218
00:13:22,450 --> 00:13:26,330
What does Mr. Roper think of your dog?
Oh, he thinks the world of it. Oh.

219
00:13:26,830 --> 00:13:28,090
He'd be lost without her.

220
00:13:30,390 --> 00:13:32,550
Truffles, here, girl. Come on. Where are
you?

221
00:13:32,770 --> 00:13:33,810
Oh, excuse me.

222
00:13:34,210 --> 00:13:35,270
Have you seen a wasp's name?

223
00:13:35,890 --> 00:13:39,190
What? Oh, my wife would kill me. I tied
her up and she got away.

224
00:13:39,610 --> 00:13:40,610
What, your wife?

225
00:13:41,190 --> 00:13:42,190
No, no, no.

226
00:13:42,650 --> 00:13:43,650
Yorkshire doodad.

227
00:13:44,090 --> 00:13:44,949
Wasp's name.

228
00:13:44,950 --> 00:13:45,950
Terrier.

229
00:13:46,230 --> 00:13:47,230
Ah, yeah.

230
00:13:47,650 --> 00:13:51,430
Little thing, pointy ears, little airy
body.

231
00:13:51,770 --> 00:13:52,770
That's it?

232
00:13:52,810 --> 00:13:56,810
No, I... I'll tell you what, mate. What
is your time of call?

233
00:14:39,520 --> 00:14:41,380
You won't find any growing in there.

234
00:14:47,620 --> 00:14:49,640
Troubles? Now, where are you? Come on.

235
00:14:50,040 --> 00:14:51,040
Come on, girl.

236
00:14:51,500 --> 00:14:52,500
Troubles?

237
00:14:55,820 --> 00:14:57,000
Come on, girl. Troubles?

238
00:14:57,480 --> 00:14:58,480
Troubles, where are you?

239
00:14:59,240 --> 00:15:00,240
Troubles, come on down.

240
00:15:00,660 --> 00:15:01,660
Are you in here?

241
00:15:02,080 --> 00:15:03,080
Oh, dear.

242
00:15:03,400 --> 00:15:05,280
Where did she come from?

243
00:15:06,040 --> 00:15:07,040
Come on, girl.

244
00:15:27,980 --> 00:15:31,120
I visited her with a kennel club, of
course. Oh, look, there's her full name.

245
00:15:31,800 --> 00:15:34,020
Truffles de Bourbon Fitzwilliam III.

246
00:15:34,340 --> 00:15:38,440
Quite a pedigree, Mildred. If she could
talk, she certainly wouldn't talk to any

247
00:15:38,440 --> 00:15:39,440
of us. You're right.

248
00:15:42,620 --> 00:15:43,620
Well,

249
00:15:50,680 --> 00:15:52,420
here we are, home again, Truffles.

250
00:15:54,570 --> 00:15:56,990
You can't come in here. There's a girl.

251
00:15:59,570 --> 00:16:01,550
I'm training her, Mildred.

252
00:16:02,010 --> 00:16:05,550
Obedience. Well, don't leave her out
there, George. Bring her in.

253
00:16:06,030 --> 00:16:08,090
Eh? Well, bring her in.

254
00:16:08,410 --> 00:16:09,410
Bring her in? Hmm.

255
00:16:09,610 --> 00:16:11,750
Yeah, well, I'll go and bring her in.

256
00:16:14,170 --> 00:16:16,170
Ah, she's gone upstairs.

257
00:16:16,850 --> 00:16:18,170
There she goes, upstairs.

258
00:16:20,630 --> 00:16:21,630
Yes, she's, er...

259
00:16:22,120 --> 00:16:23,860
gone to clean her teeth or something.

260
00:16:24,840 --> 00:16:26,400
That's some training programme.

261
00:16:26,780 --> 00:16:29,400
Well, leave the door open, George, and
then she'll come in when she wants to.

262
00:16:29,720 --> 00:16:30,800
Do you want a cup of tea?

263
00:16:31,040 --> 00:16:32,260
Oh, yes, yes.

264
00:16:33,100 --> 00:16:36,060
Are you going to let her have puppies,
Mildred? Oh, yes.

265
00:16:36,400 --> 00:16:38,600
I want her to have everything that I've
missed.

266
00:16:40,820 --> 00:16:47,600
Mildred, you know this morning when I
said that I went out to take her out and

267
00:16:47,600 --> 00:16:49,260
lose her? I didn't mean it.

268
00:16:50,250 --> 00:16:56,290
Of course you didn't mean it, George.
No, I mean... If I was

269
00:16:56,290 --> 00:17:00,870
the loser or something, I'd be... Well,
I wouldn't do it deliberately.

270
00:17:01,430 --> 00:17:02,510
It would be accidental.

271
00:17:02,950 --> 00:17:04,190
Well, of course, George.

272
00:17:04,630 --> 00:17:06,550
And then I'd accidentally strangle you.

273
00:17:07,690 --> 00:17:10,510
I think I'll take her out for another
walk.

274
00:17:12,990 --> 00:17:15,430
You're right, Mildred. He does like her.
Yes.

275
00:17:18,750 --> 00:17:23,300
Yes. Yes, sir. I see, sir. Yes, sir.
Could you... Yes, sir. Well, could you

276
00:17:23,300 --> 00:17:24,599
describe the symptoms?

277
00:17:25,240 --> 00:17:26,240
I see.

278
00:17:26,560 --> 00:17:28,780
Floating upside down in the water.

279
00:17:29,380 --> 00:17:31,680
That sounds rather serious, I'm afraid,
sir.

280
00:17:32,120 --> 00:17:33,380
Especially for a budgerigar.

281
00:17:34,560 --> 00:17:38,500
Well, perhaps a drop of brandy might
help. Oh, you've already had some.

282
00:17:38,960 --> 00:17:43,440
I see. Well, all I can suggest is...
That's right, sir. Why don't you

283
00:17:43,440 --> 00:17:44,259
the vet?

284
00:17:44,260 --> 00:17:45,860
Oh, good afternoon, sir. Hello.

285
00:17:46,300 --> 00:17:48,440
I'm looking for a Yorkshire... What's
the name?

286
00:17:48,720 --> 00:17:49,679
Pudding? Yes.

287
00:17:49,680 --> 00:17:50,680
No, no, no.

288
00:17:50,700 --> 00:17:52,020
Terrier, you know, sort of dog.

289
00:17:52,280 --> 00:17:55,400
Oh, a dog. I'm glad you mentioned that.
Otherwise I might have to try and sell

290
00:17:55,400 --> 00:17:56,400
you a Yorkshire Terrier cat.

291
00:17:57,260 --> 00:17:58,800
Well, said this way, sir.

292
00:17:59,200 --> 00:18:02,360
Are you sure you wouldn't rather have a
ferret, sir? No, I would not rather have

293
00:18:02,360 --> 00:18:03,580
a ferret, but I just will.

294
00:18:03,920 --> 00:18:05,180
Over here, sir, the last of it.

295
00:18:05,380 --> 00:18:06,380
There you are.

296
00:18:06,620 --> 00:18:08,900
Probably pure Yorkshire, that, sir.

297
00:18:09,200 --> 00:18:13,040
Probably? Yeah, probably. You see, its
grandmother got out the gate. When she

298
00:18:13,040 --> 00:18:15,340
come back, well, she looked too pleased
with herself, see?

299
00:18:16,200 --> 00:18:17,200
Yeah.

300
00:18:18,000 --> 00:18:20,100
Well, she looks similar.

301
00:18:20,980 --> 00:18:24,320
Would you say it had a wistful look in
its eye with a twinkle of scampishness?

302
00:18:24,620 --> 00:18:26,360
Well, yes, but not as much as a ferret.

303
00:18:26,820 --> 00:18:27,820
All right, I'll take her.

304
00:18:28,120 --> 00:18:29,120
She'll never know the difference.

305
00:18:29,320 --> 00:18:30,860
Shall I wrap it up for you, sir? Oh,
yes.

306
00:18:32,740 --> 00:18:38,620
Good afternoon,

307
00:18:42,560 --> 00:18:44,000
madam. I believe this is your dog.

308
00:18:45,360 --> 00:18:46,360
Shruffles!

309
00:18:47,660 --> 00:18:48,359
find her?

310
00:18:48,360 --> 00:18:49,840
In the vicinity of the park, madam.

311
00:18:50,280 --> 00:18:53,960
She was brought to my attention by a
pavement artist who just had half his

312
00:18:53,960 --> 00:18:54,939
Lisa washed up.

313
00:18:54,940 --> 00:18:55,940
Oh.

314
00:18:56,780 --> 00:18:59,240
Oh. You naughty girl.

315
00:18:59,800 --> 00:19:01,460
Wasn't there a man with her? My husband?

316
00:19:01,760 --> 00:19:02,960
No, apparently not, madam.

317
00:19:03,500 --> 00:19:05,720
But if we come across him, we'll return
him as well.

318
00:19:06,600 --> 00:19:08,480
As long as he's got his identity disc
on.

319
00:19:08,840 --> 00:19:13,400
Thank you. You know, I just don't
understand this. I mean, she was here

320
00:19:13,400 --> 00:19:14,400
minutes ago.

321
00:19:14,720 --> 00:19:16,720
Well, at least I thought she...

322
00:19:18,380 --> 00:19:19,380
I see.

323
00:19:34,380 --> 00:19:36,440
Geoffrey, Geoffrey, it's Mr Roper.

324
00:19:36,680 --> 00:19:42,460
Yeah, I brought the dog round to show
her to you before I show her to Mildred.

325
00:19:43,000 --> 00:19:45,100
There she is. I've already seen her.

326
00:19:45,320 --> 00:19:47,160
She dug up my garden this morning.

327
00:19:47,590 --> 00:19:48,590
Oh, good, yeah.

328
00:19:48,850 --> 00:19:49,930
Yeah, that's Tuffles.

329
00:19:50,930 --> 00:19:53,230
It's a similar face, isn't it?

330
00:19:53,710 --> 00:19:54,710
To what?

331
00:19:55,450 --> 00:19:58,470
To the one she had this morning when she
rooted among the marigolds.

332
00:19:58,870 --> 00:20:01,250
Mr Roper, you are exacerbating the
situation.

333
00:20:01,990 --> 00:20:04,190
Yeah? Oh, it's nice of you to say so.

334
00:20:05,190 --> 00:20:06,190
Now, look here.

335
00:20:06,230 --> 00:20:08,350
Geoffrey, Geoffrey, what's your blood
pressure?

336
00:20:08,570 --> 00:20:09,570
Yes.

337
00:20:09,690 --> 00:20:12,170
Yes. You've got high blood pressure,
have you?

338
00:20:12,510 --> 00:20:14,930
Yes. He's only had it for about three
months.

339
00:20:15,260 --> 00:20:16,720
Ah, that's about when we moved in.

340
00:20:18,380 --> 00:20:19,380
Yes.

341
00:20:19,780 --> 00:20:22,620
You know, you want to take it easy, son,
relax, you know, do a bit of gardening.

342
00:20:25,100 --> 00:20:27,180
Well, I mean, it isn't a bit of a mess
out there, is it?

343
00:20:27,660 --> 00:20:28,660
Yeah, well, I'll be off then.

344
00:20:29,060 --> 00:20:31,040
You didn't recognise her then?

345
00:20:31,360 --> 00:20:32,360
Ah, yes.

346
00:20:32,660 --> 00:20:33,740
Yeah, well done.

347
00:20:35,980 --> 00:20:39,200
How do you feel about emigrating?

348
00:20:42,890 --> 00:20:44,790
Did the nasty man lose you then?

349
00:20:45,070 --> 00:20:49,810
Never mind. When the nasty man comes
back home, you can bury him in the

350
00:20:52,490 --> 00:20:53,490
Mildred?

351
00:20:53,710 --> 00:20:57,110
Come on, in you go. Have your dindins.

352
00:20:57,770 --> 00:20:58,770
In you go.

353
00:21:02,830 --> 00:21:03,830
Mildred?

354
00:21:08,130 --> 00:21:09,130
Ah.

355
00:21:09,790 --> 00:21:11,110
Here I am, Mildred.

356
00:21:13,060 --> 00:21:15,500
Home. With truffles. Here she is.

357
00:21:20,120 --> 00:21:22,060
George? Yeah, safely home.

358
00:21:22,280 --> 00:21:24,640
I mean, I didn't lose her or anything.

359
00:21:25,240 --> 00:21:28,240
There. She looks exactly the same,
doesn't she?

360
00:21:28,960 --> 00:21:32,500
Well, I mean, if she doesn't, well,
that's probably because she's a bit

361
00:21:32,500 --> 00:21:33,760
than she was when you last saw her.

362
00:21:35,700 --> 00:21:38,080
Yes, of course, George. I see.

363
00:21:39,040 --> 00:21:42,400
Do you think... By any chance, she just
looks a little bit bigger?

364
00:21:42,840 --> 00:21:47,280
No. Oh, well, there was a shower of rain
in the park.

365
00:21:48,860 --> 00:21:50,520
And they swill, you know.

366
00:21:51,820 --> 00:21:54,480
She seems to have lost her identity,
does she?

367
00:21:54,760 --> 00:21:58,620
Well, oh, yes, it got bitten off by a
duck.

368
00:22:00,400 --> 00:22:04,500
No, no, George, ducks don't eat metal.
No, you're thinking of ostriches.

369
00:22:05,120 --> 00:22:06,120
Ostriches, yeah, that's it.

370
00:22:06,960 --> 00:22:08,660
No, no, no, not that.

371
00:22:10,860 --> 00:22:15,500
George, there is some other small change
that I seem to have noticed.

372
00:22:15,840 --> 00:22:16,840
What's that?

373
00:22:17,280 --> 00:22:20,440
Well, Truffles was a girl when you took
her out. Now she's a boy.

374
00:22:23,360 --> 00:22:25,840
Trust you to spot a thing like that.

375
00:22:27,120 --> 00:22:31,780
Oh, well, I mean, you heard her read
about people changing sex, you know, in

376
00:22:31,780 --> 00:22:32,699
Sunday papers.

377
00:22:32,700 --> 00:22:36,200
Yeah, well, I mean, why not a dog? I
mean, dogs can easily get...

378
00:22:36,200 --> 00:22:40,220
Snap.

379
00:22:49,160 --> 00:22:50,480
Wake up, Uncle George.

380
00:22:50,820 --> 00:22:54,200
Yes. A nice little cold nose in each
ear. There we go.

381
00:22:54,740 --> 00:22:55,780
Wakey, wakey.

382
00:22:56,360 --> 00:22:57,640
Oh, no,

383
00:22:58,420 --> 00:22:59,199
not again.

384
00:22:59,200 --> 00:23:00,840
Oh, God, not two of them.

385
00:23:01,460 --> 00:23:02,460
Get off.

386
00:23:02,640 --> 00:23:06,380
I'm sick of your stupid truffles. This
is not truffles, George.

387
00:23:06,860 --> 00:23:07,900
It's snuffles.

388
00:23:08,180 --> 00:23:10,960
Or waffles or something.

389
00:23:11,160 --> 00:23:12,160
I haven't made up my mind.

390
00:23:12,220 --> 00:23:14,740
Well, we can't keep both of them. It
doubled the paper bill. Oh, you're

391
00:23:14,740 --> 00:23:16,100
absolutely right, George. You are.

392
00:23:16,570 --> 00:23:19,270
Well, we've got a dog and a bitch here.
Of course we can't keep both of them.

393
00:23:19,530 --> 00:23:23,290
I mean, when they get older, they'll,
er... Well, you know what they'll do.

394
00:23:23,650 --> 00:23:24,970
No. No, you wouldn't.

395
00:23:26,910 --> 00:23:29,770
Oh, that, yeah, I thought of that. No,
you never do.

396
00:23:31,070 --> 00:23:34,950
I'll take them back to Pet Shop,
Scruffles or Piffles or whatever. No,

397
00:23:35,130 --> 00:23:36,870
I've got a much better idea.

398
00:23:39,010 --> 00:23:41,510
Oh, thank you. You mean he's mine, I can
keep him?

399
00:23:41,770 --> 00:23:42,770
Yes, dear.

400
00:23:43,970 --> 00:23:47,190
Ah, well, we may have to get rid of him,
but you can keep the dog.

401
00:23:48,370 --> 00:23:49,370
You're sure, Anne?

402
00:23:49,510 --> 00:23:50,509
Yes, Mildred.

403
00:23:50,510 --> 00:23:51,510
Just look at its face.

404
00:23:51,950 --> 00:23:54,790
Anne, Tristram. Ah, leave this to me.

405
00:23:59,610 --> 00:24:00,610
Geoffrey.

406
00:24:00,810 --> 00:24:03,490
Geoffrey, you're not going to like this,
but I'm about to talk you into letting

407
00:24:03,490 --> 00:24:04,490
Tristram have a dog.

408
00:24:04,550 --> 00:24:05,570
No need to, Anne.

409
00:24:05,870 --> 00:24:06,870
I've already got it.